Be good...

... to yourself...

Before you can be good to others...

I am not asking you to be selfish...
I am just asking you to be nice to yourself before you expect others to be nice to you...
and I am asking you to be nice to yourself so that you know how to be nice to others as well...

Remember:
While you think you are important,
So does everyone else think themselves important...

While there are people who think they are worthless...
There are more people who think they are worth a zillion pounds.

Where do you allocate yourself then?
Worthless or worthy?

I don't judge myself on either end...
That's God's duty...

My duty is to be good to myself and to those around me...

If I cannot be nice to people,
I knew that I will get the same treatment in return...
It's just the matter of time until someone ditch me back to my face...

A great lesson learn...
Kindness doesn't make you a pure saint...
It is just to make the world a better place...

Why do you want to cause more chaos than it already is?
Just be good and loving...

While nobody will remember to thank you for being good to them...
Trust me,
You will thank yourself for being good to yourself and others...

At least you can sleep peacefully...
Knowing that...
You have no loan...
You have no grudges...
You have no hatred...
And you have no anger...

Then,
You will be more than willing to leave the world tomorrow...
If God will to collect you early...
At least you don't have to say...
"I still have lots to do yet..."
Because your duty is already done...
When you are doing good to others... and give them the smile of the day...

Home….

…is where the heart is…

It is a place where hospitality never wears out…

There is always smile at the door when you step into the house…

And even if anger roars within the room,

You know you still belong to such a place…

Nobody can kick you out regardless to circumstances…

It is a place whereby you can leave your hat on the table and remove your mask…

You can stop playing pretend…

You don’t have to win favouritism…

You don’t have to be someone else…

You just be you…

It is the place for you to grow…

You learn to develop your character behind closed door…

All your mocking and scolding are hidden from public eyes…

While you are being trained to be a better person…

Before you reveal the end result to the society…

It is a place where you can do whatever you want...

Without fearing of naysayers…

Your home is the first place that see your million mistakes…

Before you dare to show your special ability to the world,

It is a place where you can be who you are…

You can hug your soft toys even at old age,

You can talk to the walls without fearing of being laughed at…

You can waltz across the room without having anybody calling you 'insane'…

You can hold the hairbrush and sing in your cocky voice and nobody will judge you…

It’s a place whereby it is more than just the roof, four walls, doors and windows…

It is a place of love and comfort…

It is a place that you can come home to when there is nowhere else to go to…

It is the place where you feel belong…

It is the place whereby you know you can never do without…

It is the place whereby your soul find peace…

It is the place whereby… you don’t feel like leaving anymore…

And that’s permanent…

That’s home…

You are beautiful...

I woke up this morning...
And the first word that I heard out of nowhere is this...

"You are beautiful..."

No, I am all alone in the room.
I am a happy one-person room settler...
But to be told of such thing the moment I wake up is just so bizarre....

Humans aren't always good at saying "You are beautiful" to me when I woke up with a messy-bed hair and bad breath...
And I don't even bother about it at all because I knew that I don't deserve it until I get myself thoroughly clean and pretty-looking for such compliment...

But what amazed me is that...
The inner voice that said is out of nowhere just enlightened me...
I turned around searching for the source but failed..
Then it came again...

"You are beautiful just as you are..."

"It's good to be clean and nice smelling; 
Adorning with skirts and tiara like a royal princess should be...
But do not think for one second that you should picture-perfect be...

Measure your heart, my dearest...
Measure your heart...
Be kind... Be gentle... Be humble... Be loving and be compassionate...
That's the key to your true beauty...

Feel free to dance and swirl in circles, my daughter...
Sing and play as you wish, 
Laugh, smile and be joyful,
All to your dearest heart content...

Do that split jump that you always wanted to do,
Freely swirl in circle and allowed yourself to fall on the ground with laughter..
Grab the violin and bow a tune that you have in your head...
Or sing whatever songs you know by heart...
Or just play some snatches of music to your favourite instruments...

You are gifted from the get-go...
You are born creative...
Born to move and dance and charm the world...
Born to smile and warm the hardest heart and the coolest stare...
Born to love abundantly... So much so, there is love at your heel...

The world need more smile and laughter, my girl...
Be the world...
Be the world of such smile, laughter, joy and happiness.
Be the world of dance and music...
Be the world...
And be beautiful...

For you are beautiful - princess..."

I smiled...
Jeans and shorts...
They were once-a-upon my favourite...
And I still have it for home wear...
But now, I am looking into skirts and girly stuffs...

Shall I wear a pink skirt or the blue one? Or the peach one?
Stretching my head, I knew that whichever one I wear will be great...
Because if they don't suit me at all, they will not be in my collection...

The hair-bow...
Beautiful pink polka dots on my ponytail...
Or shall I go for blue or the purple one?
Hmmm....
What a choice!

For the first time,
I feel the true girly-girl energy soaring out of me....
And then crazily went for a wee swirl to reveal my true feminism...

But I know that the Father loves His daughter more than her clothes...
He loves her for her inner soul...
The little spirit that outreach and love others...
The girl that said, "Daddy, let's drop a couple of coins into the beggar's cup."
Or "let's feed the homeless..."
Or "let's right those wrong and be kind to others again..."

That's what our Father in Heaven wants to see from each one of us...
To be kind and compassionate to those in need....

Let's be beautiful from the inside out...

Let's see who need help...

"Hello, how may I help you?"

Count your blessing...

It is the little thing that matters...

Do you have food on the table?
If you do, give thanks...
There are people from the third-world country who are starving without a piece of rice/ string of noodle on their plate...

Do you have clothes to wear and change?
If you do,
You are luckier than those who only have clothes that are much shorter than themselves...

Do you have roof above your head?
If you do,
You are so much more fortunate than those who has to endure under the weather like plants in the garden

Do you have someone to say 'I love You' every night before bedtime?
If you do, please count your blessing for every single second that word is murmured to your heart...
Some people are dying to hear that for the last time before they take their last breath!

Count your blessing...
Stop complaining...
Things don't change when you grumble...
So, learn to enjoy what is good in those hard time...

Life is a gift...

Out of zillions sperms, only one survive to become a human.
Will that helps you to know that you are only of the luckiest sperm that got to become a human?
Will it helps you to know that you're the CHOSEN one?

i personally believe that each one of us are very lucky to be on earth...
To have so many things in life...
To have good food to eat..
To have beautiful clothes to wear...
To have a house to call our own
And to have someone to love you abundantly...

That is a blessing to each one of us...

So,
Please keep counting your blessing...

Be different…Be You!

I guess it is something that all of us heard about long ago…

But most of us refused to apply to it…

Because…

We are afraid to be strange and alone?

We are scare of being the weird-case in the group…

I used to be scare of being different…

Refused to be outcast…

I want to belong to someone else…

I want to be everywhere where my friends are…

To the point that when people abandoned me,

I fear of isolation…

And little did I know…

Nobody wants me to be part of their group…

They said, I don’t belong…

I am not like them…

I cannot be their friends…

And they wish that I leave them alone at times…

But nobody was brave enough to tell me the truth…

Until one of them blurted it right into my face…

When things like that happen,

I ended up asking myself…

“Why me out of everyone else?”

I am like them…

Or so I thought?

I tried to change myself to blend in with them…

But I am still unacceptable…

Sigh…

Surely there must be someone who can accept me, right?

No…

I ended up doing everything alone…

A lone-ranger being laughed at for being alone…

I tried to find cure/ solution to my isolation but no answers…

Ended up,

I am still mobbing on the street alone…

It was many years later,

A voice spoke to me…

“Why are you so desperate to be accepted?

Why do you want to be the one for them when you are uniquely yourself?

Is it because of approval?

Is it due to lack of confident?

Why do you want people to say… “You are who I needed’?

When you should say to yourself… “I am all I need…”

Life doesn’t change if you wait for someone else to change…

Life change when YOU change yourself!

So,

I begin to pluck my courage,

And left the bunch of friends that doesn’t count me in…

And start training myself to be valuable on the inside out…

Without any expectation from others…

Be completely outstanding…

Be someone that nobody can be…

Because only you can be you!

It wasn’t easy to begin with…

But I brave it all out…

I may look like an oddball within the crowd…

But I am fine with it…

I learn to accept the difference between all other human beings…

When people look at me,

They have different opinion of me…

Some may say I am lonely or quiet or shy…

But that’s fine….

Such comment doesn’t define me entirely…

As the saying goes…

“Don’t judge a book by its cover…”

Loneliness doesn’t mean lonely…

There is a friend within the thin air…

If we knows how to acquaintance with it…

Then you will know that someone is always there…

I have learnt that well…

My secret friends are my music and my soul…

People cannot hear my music,

Because music only sings to me…

Unless I willingly share it out…

Yet nobody knows until they saw me scrabble it on a piece of paper…

But still,

It doesn’t sum me up as a whole…

You need more details to portrait me in depth…

Even artists can tell you that you need at least 100 of hours to paint a live portrait before you can call it ‘done!’

Suddenly,

I am comfortable in being myself…

I am good in being me…

Being different…

Being special…

Now,

I don’t need to find someone to accept me anymore…

Because,

In the end, I am still uniquely me…

I am me…

So,

Just be true…

Be YOU!

Be happy...

Such simple word...
But so difficult to achieve...

Are you truly happy with who you are?
Are you truly happy with what you have?

What are you complaining about?
What are you so worry about?

Look at the flower...
Today they are here...
Tomorrow, you may not see them again...
But they have no worries...
They knew that God will take care of them...
So why are you so worry when you are made into Hid very own image?

Why can't you be happy?

Let the world condemn you...
When someone condemn them in return...
They will regret...
But never condemn others as a revenge...
For you will be punish for your wrongdoing if you do as that....
Let nature takes it course...
The nature has a natural way of teaching us great life lesson...

People who hurt others, will be hurt in return...
Whether it is intentional or accidental...

People who curse others will be cursed in return...

People who mocked others will be mocked...

Just walk away and continue your happy life...
When the time comes,
It will come in an abundance!

Then the one with the last smile... Will be the insult-er(s)

You have smiled your fair share long time ago...

Just be happy...

God’s plan…

Try it as you may…

You can never go against the law of God…

Fight as you wish…

You may or may not win depends on how it aligns to God’s plan for you…

Kick a fuss if you want…

If it is not yours… it’s NOT yours!

Oh, maybe… it’s not time yet?

I have been there and done that…

Or else I won’t be able to say as to this….

I have tried to run away from things I didn’t want to face…

I have spent few years avoiding it…

But in the end, the truth resurface…

It’s like, going round the circle and find yourself coming back to the same spot…

In short to say…

It’s more like time wasting in between…

Although it is more of a lesson learnt – not to avoid problems that should be faced!

It’s not the way I wanted it to be…

But it is the way God wants us to be…

It’s not my say nor your say…

But the Most Highest that says…

I have tried to win…

But after a few years,

Because no matter what happened…

I still go back to where I didn’t want to be…

In the end, I have to surrender…

God wins... in His plan...

My testimony: Dreamt of bible verses...

A lot of people don't like it when I mentioned about God...

But I do want to share how do I know it's Him and not anyone else...

People who read this might think I made it all up.

But if miracles had happened to you in the past,

You know the impossibility can always be possible!

I remember when I was 13,

A very dear friend of mine died of cancer...

After her passing,

I was fully remorsed over it and wouldn't want to sleep much that full year round...

My life - on the outside - looks good...

But on the inside,

It was a complete messed up!

I was in a full blown depression yet nobody knows about it...

They thought I was just deflating myself as a passage of adolescent...

But what they didn't know is that...

There is a the great sore inside my heart that kept pulling me down all the time...

And I just cannot lift it up anymore...

Then it came to the stage whereby,

I was completely insomniac.

And I begin to wonder when was the last time I had a proper full 8 hours sleep...

The last full 8 hours sleep was the final month before my friend's died...

Then it came an unforgettable night...

For some odd reasons,

I managed to get into a deep sleep...

There wasn't any changes within my surrounding or whatsoever...

The things in my room was the same as the past years...

But I had an unexpected knocked-out tho...

Then I had a dream...

In that dream,

I saw a bright golden light shining towards my face...

and then a thick book just opened itself up...

It's funny how a book can opened on its own but that's exactly how it looks like!

When I try to look closely into the wording,

The first word I saw was 'Ecclesiastes' on the heading...

When I tried to read those words on the content,

Words began to fly out of the pages....

Like Ecclesiastes 3:1-8, Exodus 14:14, Psalms 46:10, Psalms 40:1-3, Isaiah 41:10, Deut. 31:8, Hosea 13;14 and etc...

These are verses that, later on I checked out were words of comfort from the Lord..

For those of you who read the bible,

You know that all those mentioned verses are from the Old Testament. 

I have no association with the Old Testament during my young Christianity life... 

Until many years later when I decided to study the bible at the age of 21...

So the whole idea of having all these bible verses thrown at me in dreams were really bizarre...

One cannot made up stuff when one doesn't even know such thing exist!

And so it is the same for me...

I don't even know such verses exist in life...

Therefore I am unable to produce such comforting words to myself when I was fully in depression!

It was until I woke up and constantly asking myself: 

"What does it mean?"

Then I saw my bible shining out of the bookcase next to my bed...

I got down from the bed...

Approached my bookcase...

And pulled out the bible and then...

A wind blow out of nowhere... 

(I remember checking the window and it was closed! So no wind from outside!)

And the pages just flipped on its own and landed exactly on Ecclesiastes book...

Then a bright highlight shone out from Ecclesiastes 3:1-8...

There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

After I finish it,

The wind blow again to another verse….

And another verses and another and another till I got so dizzy with all the page flipping…

By miracle,

I was reading those verses in a completely dark room….

But there was light constantly shining on all the verses that required me to focus on…

And the most amazing part is that…

After I finish reading,

I felt my heart lifted up…

It was such an unusual occasion for me…

Because I have been so down for a long time…

And then suddenly,

I just feel so happy again – for no particular reason…

It was the crazies moment that I have ever felt in my life…

But that’s the truest I can speak about the miracle that God has performed on me…

That for the very first time I realised it was He that comforted me…

This is one of the first few miracles that God performed on me during my awareness.

There are many more that I will share at the later post…

So,

If you really want to read more on my other miracles…

Please feel free to check it out on my next few posts - coming soon…

Journey with Christ....

…it’s very different from our usual ‘logical’ plan…

…it’s uniquely ours…

…it’s really challenging…

…it’s life-changing….

I think some of you will believe that we all have different agenda in life…

We have different path…

Some of us share the same journey all the way to the end…

But many of us share the same journey and then split in the middle…

Or, there are lots of people that we just meet at the crossroad…

But the journey with God is endless…

It doesn’t matter how many turns we take…

He is always there…

It doesn’t matter who we split up in the middle of the journey,

He is still there…

There are lots of humps in front of us…

Lots of potholes,

Lots of manic people around us…

Yet,

God is still there…

There are roads that may have been walked many times... 
That we can see thousands of footprints on it…
And there are paths that has never been discovered before…

And we wonder what is in store ahead…

It is such a nerve wrecking moment every time we walk on 'strange' paths

That we can literally hear ourselves praying all the way thru...
Pray that nothing will frighten us until we reach the end of the journey…

And then breathe with relief when we survive the cross…

Little did we know,

God has fought and tucked in thousands of beast that are ahead of us before we walk the path…

So that we can come out safe and sound…

God is our protector...

He has protected us from day one till the end…
He hasn't given up hope...
He is still fighting...
While we are crying (for help!)

But to be fair to us (and to Him),

We also need to face some challenges on our own accords…

So that we will learn to appreciate all He has done for us…

Because we, as humans, are very ungrateful when things come easy for us…

We greed more than we need…

We boast as if the world belongs to us…

When everyone else also have a fair share to it…

We think highly of ourselves…

But very little of others…

That’s why sometimes we must expect to face challenges…

The same challenge that God has been fighting for us when we were too weak to do it ourselves…
So that we will learn to say 'Thank you' to all the amazing work that He has done for us...

That’s why I summarised the journey with God as…

…different plan from our usual ‘logical’ timeline…

…uniquely ours…

…challenging…

…life-changing…

I wish I could share all my funny/ foolish stories about how God has turn my life around in circle...

But I have to say tho…

"Let’s keep it for the next few posts now…."

At least you know…

My journey with God is like discovering the world in a different perspective…

I mean – more than just your average two eyes can see…

It’s about believing, trusting and faithfully walking with Him…
It is more on the spiritually and emotional level than our physical body can ever reach...

Keep on loving…

Our life is supposed to be made of love…

But we are always on the ignorance side when it comes to love emotions.

Especially when we don’t get what we want,

We start throwing tantrums and grumbling like a spoilt child.

We lost our sense of gratitude and start hating people…

Love isn’t only for our spouse/ partners/ girlfriend/ boyfriend.

Love is for everyone – from our family members, friends, colleagues to strangers and ENEMIES!

But we purposefully only choose to love those who gives us what we want…

While completely cast out those who have nothing of our desire…

That’s how selfish we are as human being…

We think only of ourselves…

And no more than our circle of self-worth…

Anything beyond that is none of our concern…

That’s why the world is losing its compassionate love.

Everything is all about ‘Me, me, me, me, Me, ME!!!

We boost about who we are… but hardly a compliment towards others…

We show-off our materials… but never allowed others to lay a finger upon it…

If people doesn’t meet our expectation,

They are out of the league…

But when we got cast out, we plead to be taken back…

We have more self-love but only love a size of a pea for others…

Why?

Who taught us that?

What have become of us?

Friends,

Now I know why…

We love lesser than we are supposed to be…

Because we have been conquered by the devil…

Believe it or not…

We all have that moment when we have problem with people….

We want to fight, shout, scream, argue and etc…

That every onuce of anger inside us just wanted to be lashed out in split second…

You know that feeling when you lashed out – it just feel like you have achieved something grand…

But it actually hurt so much at the end of it…

I can’t tell you how many times I have been there and done that…

And every single time it happens,

I feel like the worst person on earth…

But thankfully,

I am glad to embed myself into meditation.

In my case,

My sort of meditation is to recite Christian bible verses…

It has do me lots of good than anything else…

And it is through that that I realized…

I have been controlled by the devil who is constantly trying to win me over all the time…

The devil has downplayed us by making us go insane with our behavior…

The devil has stir turmoil in our life and relationship…

The devil has caused us to fight and argue with our family even though it is avoidable...

The devil has won us over…

Is that what we want?

If not,

Let us stop it here…

Stop the devil from taking away our loved ones…

Stop him from destroying our life and relationship…

Stop him from scaring us and fearing us to death…

Don’t allow him to rule us…

Everytime someone throw hateful remarks at you,

Understand that it is not that person that hated you…

It is the devil that possess in their body that hates you…

So, please do not be fooled and make enemies with people…

Because none of us deserves enemies…

We all need more love than anything else…

So,

Just keep praying…

And don’t ever give up…

Just keep loving all over again and again….

Make the devil angry and he will eventually leave you alone…

“Be on your guard. Stand firm in faith. Be courageous. Be strong. Do everything in love.” – 1 Corinthians 16:13-14

Do NOT Judge…

It is so easy to judge others…

When we should be judged just as them…

Yet,

We detest it when someone stabbed on us…

The most well-known bible verse from Matthew 7:1-5 (NIV) for this topic is this:

 “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Isn’t that like a slap on your own face?

You ditch someone…

In return, you, too, will be ditched for the same account…

When you snared at someone because they are poor, useless, illiterate, jobless and etc…

Sooner or later, you/ your descendant will face the same fact…

“What comes round… Goes round…”

Snare at the beggar… One day, you or your descendent will be one of the beggars.

Snare at the jobless man… One day, you or your loved one will be jobless as well…

Snare at the illiterate who can still earn an income through other good means… One day, your descendent will strike with a learning disability disease that can’t even keep himself upward…

“What comes round… Goes round…”

Friends,

Life is hard enough without further judgement…

We need kindness, not criticism…

We need help, not demoralisation…

We need love, not scornfulness…

Yet, it is the latter that we get and that’s what we give…

when expectation is not being met….

Life is so ‘stuck-up!’

(And we all better be careful of that, noe…)

For the days of humbleness is fading off….

And sooner or later…

We will be living in the world of closed doors…

There will be no more friendly face-to-face conversation over a cup of coffee/ tea…

But rather,

A mobile device glued to the face…

There will be lesser children at the park/ playground…

But more kids confined indoors not knowing who their neighbours are…

The number of obesity increased…

And lesser healthy people in the world…

(No wonder there are more and more hospitals than ever!)

More grade ‘A’s on the report card…

But lesser understanding/ physical output to the subject…

I see more straight-A students on the rise…

But when asked to present themselves upfront,

Their mouth were glued…

Tongue were knotted…

Yet, they are proud of the A’s on their report card…

When someone asked me if my result are just as fantastic as theirs…

I downplayed myself…

“Life isn’t for showing off”

No point telling people how good you are, when you can’t even present yourself at all….

Only true friends know the truth…

They know how much you’ve struggled…

I rather be poor in monetary even though I am richer in knowledge…

I rather get a scrap on my report card when I can actually fly higher than my peers on the presentation skill…

I rather live in a tiny house and be happy to help those who doesn’t have roof above their head…

Please bow down with humblesness…

Life isn’t all rich and mighty…

It is for us to flourish it with pure joy and happiness…

So please don’t judge people by what they don’t have…

Or what doesn’t meet your expectation…

You are you…

And they are they…

Help others, if you can…

If not, please leave them alone…

Including knotting your wiggling tongue!

They already have more than enough burden to deal with - without you adding more trouble into it…

Me?

I generally leave people alone...

Especially when I am incapable of helping myself begin with…

I understood enough trouble without needing more of it…

That itself helps me to be more understanding towards others who are in my shoes…

And I am very thankful for such wonderful experience…

So,

No more judgemental thinking for moi…

Our journey is our own…

Our success and downfall is ours to savour…

Only we know the struggle of whatever we went through or are going thru…

There is no need to share it out if we don’t feel like it…

Most of us, will not share it out anyway…

And that itself makes life a little challenging…

For there are lots of gossipers and critics flying around us…

That’s why Matthew 7:1-5 (NIV) comes in handy…

“Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.”

Remember: “What comes round… goes round…”

So,

Please stop judging others…

Or you, too, will be judged!